Since giving birth, Meghan Trainor says she’s noticed some differences in her sex life with husband Daryl Sabara. On a recent episode of her podcast, Workin’ On It , the singer said her husband — who she herself called “a big boy” isn’t currently meshing with her down-there situation.
“My p—- is broken, though. I have p—- anxiety,” Trainor said on the pod, chatting with guest Trisha Paytas.
When asked if it was just a meeting of two different sizes, Trainor agreed saying that she even wishes her partner’s parts could be a little less large:”I wish I could make Daryl smaller. It’s painful, dude…to the point where I’m like ‘Is it all in?’ and he’s like, ‘Just the tip.”
Now this isn’t the case of TMI podcast chaos you might be thinking, getting this far in or reading headlines about that quote. Trainor, for her part, has also been dealing with vaginismus, “a condition in which vaginal spasms occur and prevent penetration during sexual intercourse,” per the National Institutes of Health.
“Vaginismus is the body’s automatic reaction to the fear of some or all types of vaginal penetration. Whenever penetration is attempted, your vaginal muscles tighten up on their own,” per the UK’s NHS. “You have no control over it. Occasionally, you can get vaginismus even if you have previously enjoyed painless penetrative sex.”
Trainor says her symptoms manifested as “stingy” and “burny” sensations. She also said that the pain while trying to conceive Baby #2 meant she did a lot of experimentation (“Every angle” she says “each one is worse than the other,” particularly being on top) and took on some different methods to find relief from the pain while still doing the deed — from icing herself like an athlete (not a bad plan, TBH) or trying out transcendental meditation. But she’d still find herself in pain post-game in a way that didn’t feel sustainable: “I’m like, ‘Daryl, I have to work today, and I can’t walk.’”
“I thought that every woman walking around was always in pain during and after sex. I was like, ‘Doc, are you telling me that I could have sex and not feel a single bit of pain?’”
“As he would penetrate, I would be like, ‘Ow, ow, ow,” like to the point when I was making this baby, I had to ice myself after,” Trainor says. “And we’re not crazy, I’m a starfish — I go, ‘Get it done.’ We’re having fun, it’s great. Get it done. And then I’m icing myself and I go, ‘There’s gotta be another way.’”
For Trainor, she says the idea that she could be having sex without that pain was a total shock: “I thought that every woman walking around was always in pain during and after sex. I was like, ‘Doc, are you telling me that I could have sex and not feel a single bit of pain?’”
Post-pregnancy, a period where attempting intercourse is painful can happen. “Postpartum dyspareunia (PD) is a recognized phenomenon: it is estimated that 50-60 percent of women have dyspareunia 6 to 7 weeks following delivery, and 33 percent and 17 percent will still report pain during intercourse three and six months after delivery, respectively,” according to the a 2011 study from the Meir Medical Center.
Trainor says she was one of those people, noting that her desire for sex after having their son Riley was at an all-time-low: “‘Do not look at me, do not touch me.’ It took me so long to even consider having sex with him.” (She notes that her husband was a “saint” and remained patient as they navigated this condition together as a couple and we love to see that. Take notes and be like Daryl everyone!)
And expecting her second child and armed with way more information about her condition, Trainor is still optimistic that they’re going to find a system that works for them both: “I’m gonna figure it out. I’m gonna be a star at sex.”
Before you go, check out the types of orgasms you might not know about:
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